Daring to Risk Disappointment: Why Living Fully Requires Courage

"I want to change, or at least dream of a happier life—but I’m afraid I’ll be disappointed."

So many of us hold back from dreaming about what we really want, because we’re afraid. Afraid we’ll fail. Afraid we’ll be disappointed.

We settle for careers that are close to what we want—but not quite. We earn less than we feel we deserve—because we’re afraid to ask. We want to move our bodies more—but we fear we’ll quit again. We want to speak up—but we worry others won’t agree. Some of us even skip vacations because we fear how hard it’ll be to return to routine.

This fear of disappointment or other inconvenient feelings quietly runs the show.

"No one wants to ask too much from life, for fear of failing." —Paulo Coelho

I’m here to remind you: you’re allowed to dream. You’re allowed to go after what you truly want—even if it doesn’t come with guarantees.

We’re not talking about reckless risk. Of course, thoughtful decisions and planning matter. But far too often, we over-prioritize objective calculations and under-prioritize our own inner voice—what truly feels right to us.

We dismiss our desires because they seem risky. Or emotional. Or unrealistic. But in doing that, we dismiss ourselves. And in my eyes, listening to yourself—honoring your inner truth—is not only wise, it’s essential to a joyful, healthy life.

Yes, there will be disappointments. There will be failures. There will be moments that hurt. That’s part of the human experience. But those same risks also open the door to love, freedom, growth, and joy. The more we’re willing to ask for what we want, the more we make space for the life we actually long for.

Much of our fear comes from how we anticipate the emotional impact of future disappointment. Research shows we tend to overestimate how deeply or how long negative events will affect our happiness.

Researcher psychologist Dan Gilbert explains that whether people win or lose elections, gain or lose a partner, get promoted or rejected, the emotional impact is usually far less intense and far shorter than expected. Even life’s most difficult experiences tend to affect our happiness less—and for a shorter time—than we imagine. We are far more resilient than we think.

Just like a child learns to walk through falling, we learn to live through our own stumbles and setbacks. This is life.

In the end, I believe we all have two basic choices:

• Live at 50%, and potentially avoid disappointment, rejection, and failure. It might feel safer, but it’s not the life we truly want.

• Or live at 100%, knowing we may fall—but also knowing we’ll rise. This path honors who we truly are. It trusts that we can handle the hard moments, and that failure does not define us.

Yes, it takes courage to risk failing or being disappointed. But it’s absolutely worth it.

Because when we live fully, we feel more alive, more joyful, more energized. We become more ourselves.

Be thoughtful—yes. Avoid disappointment at all costs—no.

So what will you choose?

To live a half-life in hopes of avoiding failure? Or to live fully—even if it includes a few stumbles along the way?

I used to fear failure so much that I worked hard to avoid it.

Today, I know this: living a half-life is its own kind of death. Life has such amazing beautiful potential, even along the possible failing and hurting. Even in those moments of disappointment and rejection, I know: I am truly, fully alive.

—Sara